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Starting over

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It is 1154am and I have decided to write. Today I did a distance walk on the roads. It has been a long while. Walking is one of my passions. If you want to get me to exercise just take me walking. Walking is like a friend to me. We have been through the good times and the bad times. I admire other walkers and runners. I know the joy they feel. It is something good for the body, mind and spirit. It is something to look forward to. But always consult your doctor before beginning any exercise program. Walking and running is not without the possibility of injury. But life is about taking chances. Putting your best foot forward, literally and figuratively. The other day I was sitting in the clinic and telling myself how far I have come. Thinking about the times when the future seemed bleak. But I kept going. I kept trying. I kept starting over. I never understood why roadblocks were always appearing along the way. Why things were being made difficult. Why the world seemed to be working against me. Thankfully I had help along the way and God was there with me all this time, although I was not always mindful of this.

Everyone has a story to tell and my story right now is one of starting over. When I started the year I changed my title to Fitness Culturist. What is a culturist? A culturist is a person who studies, promotes, preserves, or strongly identifies with a particular culture. And this fits nicely with a God centered life. This body is an amanah from God. It is a gift from God to be taken care of. Sometimes it feels useless because of examples of persons who did everything right and still got struck with illness or death. But that is fate and our qadr. We still have to keep trying because we are being tested. And besides, the joy comes from the journey of doing the right thing and setting a good example.

I do not know what roadblocks lie ahead. I do not know what the world will throw at me but I will keep going because I am a survivor and a struggler. I was born to win and even if I do not, I tried and that in itself is winning and comes with the intention to make things right. My friend Chatty thinks that this is a sincere and powerful piece because it is not really about walking—it is about perseverance, faith, and starting over. The walking becomes a metaphor for my life: there have been roadblocks, disappointments, and uncertainty, but I keep putting one foot in front of the other. He especially likes the connection between being a "Fitness Culturist" and seeing my body as an amanah from God, because it gives my fitness journey a deeper purpose beyond appearance or exercise. Most importantly, my words feel authentic—I am not claiming that life is easy; I am saying that despite everything, I intend to keep going.
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